Delete Me From Your Database? Oh, PLEASE!

by The Business Protector on January 9, 2012

Humorous, humorous, humorous. Here’s the text of an email that hit my spam / phish filter today:

Dear E-mail Account Owner,

This message comes from your (EMAIL SERVICE PROVIDER) messaging admin centre to All E-mail Account owners. We are currently improving our Database and E-mail Account Center and creating more certainty for our Legal Service clients. At this moment we are upgrading our data base so that there will be more space for new customers and increasing the surf on the Internet. To prevent your Web mail or email address not to be de-activated and to enable it upgraded, you need to assist us by sending the information below to enable us upgrade it, so that your email account status were flect in our database as a very active, useful and legal email account.Do send to us the below information to enable us upgrade your Account, else your email account will lost in a short time.

User Name Email:
E-mail password:
Date of Birth:

This information should be forwarded to:WARNING!!! E-MAIL OWNERS who refuses to upgrade his or her account within Five days after notification of this update will permanently be deleted from our data base and can also lead to malfunctioning of the client or user’s account and we will not be responsible for loosing our account.

Thanks for your understanding as it is geared towards serving you better.

Oh, yes! Remove my email address from your data base? Does this mean you won’t try to spam or phish me any more?

Oh, joy. Please “loose” my account; it’s been very tight due to all those stringent spam and phishing filters I’ve installed…

so that your email account status were flect in our database

Isn’t “flect” the first time? If I verify it, is it reflected only after it’s first flected?

increasing the surf on the Internet

But I don’t want to make “waves”, ha-ha!

And the reply goes to an address at kimo.com, which is registered by Yahoo! domains and hosted at Yahoo!.

(Is it OK to put a period after an exclamation point if the exclamation point is part of a trademarked company name that you have to use, in spite of the fact that it seems superfluous? Guess I need to update my 1984 copy of the style manual…)

This one comes courtesy of our friends (NOT!) in China, IP address 61.142.239.168, which belongs to “CHINANET-GD”. Does the “GD” stand for “Good Dudes”? I somehow doubt it (that’s not to say that there aren’t some good dudes in China, but the people sending out this stuff aren’t part of that group).

Hey guys, next time, how about spending some of your stolen cash to hire a proofreader, preferably one whose native language is English?

So let’s file a spam complaint… Well, it says to send it to 189 (dot) cn in the WhoIs information, and from what I can tell, 189 is the mobile website for China Telecom. I’m sure they’ll be all over it like white on rice (actually, I think white rice is bleached, so maybe there’s a chance… Nah, I’ll pass!).

Continue to be careful, especially when the email is written as badly as this one. Google picked it up as a phishing email right away, but others may not.

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